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Scorecard

Woodham Mortimer Cricket Club SECOND XI v Southend-on-Sea & EMT CC 3rd XI on Sat 03 May 2025 at 13:00
Woodham Mortimer Cricket Club Won by 9 wkts

Match report 2nd XI Match Report, written by Manu Tripathi 🏏

Woodham Mortimer CC – The Glorious Season Opener (3rd May)
— by someone who still doesn’t know how many points we got

Ah, the UK in May. Normally cold, damp, and wetter than a tea-soaked Rich Tea biscuit. But miraculously, the sun came out — possibly because Lady Luck owed us or someone sacrificed a bat to the cricket gods.

Our beloved captain, fresh off a Malta sunbed (probably holding a mojito), found out on Wednesday he was actually playing — as captain. Nothing like a last-minute reality check to kickstart a season.

The Opposition:
The 1st XI looked strong (at least on paper).
The 2nd XI looked fitter, stronger — except for the usual suspects who still think warm-ups are optional.

Toss Drama:
We won the toss.
We chose to bowl.
Why? No one knows. Probably still waiting for Netflix to make a documentary about it.

Bowling Begins:
Farid and Jack opened with a barrage of dots — the scoreboard looked like a Morse code message for “HELP”.
Jack, in particular, decided to give our young wicketkeeper a masterclass in unpredictable deliveries, ensuring the poor lad would sleep like a rock that night (if not sedated by trauma first).

Then the captain went bold (or bored?) and brought on Attatullah a.k.a. Nasir — by far the best bowler on the pitch. He was practically unplayable… took 4 wickets like he was ordering from Amazon Prime.

Then, like a hero in a comedy, Mark Beams gently reminded Atta that taking a 5-fer meant he’d have to buy a round at the bar.
Atta, being a man of finance and foresight, decided he loved his wallet more than another wicket.

Also making an appearance:
A “random slow bowler” whose name is still under investigation.
George bowled tight (as always), and Jack finally got one straight enough to knock over the last man.

Opposition: 69 all out. A nice number, if you’re 13.

Batting Time (aka Bar Prep):
The top 4 chased it down in under 20 overs like they had a hot date or dinner plans.
The rest? Let’s just say they turned their disappointment into purpose — testing bar stock quality like true professionals.

The Real Challenge:
How many points did we earn?
Website: 21
Clubhouse Experts: “It’s definitely 24… or maybe 25?”
Turns out we can bowl, bat, drink, and debate — but we CANNOT count.

Meanwhile, the 1st XI were so remote, even Bear Grylls would’ve turned back. With no data, no updates, and no hope — they wisely decided to head home early.

Final Verdict:
Sunshine. Smiles. Only mild injuries.
Bar well stocked.
Captain mildly sunburnt.
Atta’s wallet safe.

A weirdly perfect start to the season. Stay tuned — if this is the beginning, the rest might just be legendary.

#UpTheWoodies

Southend-on-Sea & EMT CC 3rd XI Batting
Player name RunsMB4s6sSR
extras
TOTAL :
1nb 5w 1b  
for 10 wickets
7
69 (33.0 overs)		     
James Gilroy ct  M Clark b F Mirzai 8 28 28.57
Charlie Taylor b  F Mirzai 1 6 16.67
Mike Sweeney ct  D Hunt b A Nasari 12 32 1 37.50
Nisar Rahimi b  A Nasari 4 4 1 100
Kevin Grant b  A Nasari 0 1 0
Nabil Shaikh b  A Nasari 2 9 22.22
Andy Banks b  M Tripathi 10 33 30.30
Lee Watkinson b  M Tripathi 6 29 1 20.69
Chris Hunt b  J Preston 17 38 2 44.74
Danny Laidlaw b  G Verlander 2 11 18.18
Jamie Finlinson Not Out  0 8 0

Woodham Mortimer Cricket Club SECOND XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Jack Preston6.0117117.002.83
Farid Mirzai8.0222211.002.75
Manoj Tripathi8.021025.001.25
Attaullah Nasari8.021543.751.88
George Verlander3.00414.001.33

Woodham Mortimer Cricket Club SECOND XI Batting
Player Name RMB4s6sSRCatchesStumpingsRun outs
extras
TOTAL :
1w 5b 3lb 
for 1 wickets
9
72		        
Damian Fannon Retired Not Out  21 40 2 52.50
George Verlander Not Out  27 43 3 62.79
Danny Hunt b  N Shaikh 6 17 1 35.29 1
Imran Akhtar Not Out  9 4 2 225.00
Manoj Tripathi  
Jack Preston  
Matt Clark   1
Mark Broadhurst  
Farid Mirzai  
Asr Ali  
Attaullah Nasari  

Southend-on-Sea & EMT CC 3rd XI Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Chris Hunt4.011500.003.75
Danny Laidlaw4.001300.003.25
Nabil Shaikh3.2024124.007.20
Lee Watkinson3.00800.002.67
Nisar Rahimi3.00400.001.33